Schuckman: Darnell’s pursuit of state wrestling glory happening with his dad right by his side

QUINCY — As he sat down to talk about his looming trip to the state wrestling championships, Ryan Darnell tussled his sweaty mop of hair and asked if the interview was going to be recorded for video purposes.

You could sense the relief when he was told it wasn’t.

“Good,” the Quincy Notre Dame senior said. “If you wanted to do that, you should have come before practice. I got beat up today.”

His body language spoke of exhaustion. Darnell expected to be tired following his last full practice prior to competing in the 215-pound weight class at the Class 1A state championships beginning Thursday at State Farm Center on the University of Illinois campus in Champaign, but this was a go-home-and-crash kind of tired.

“That’s how you prepare to leave everything on the mat,” said Darnell, who takes a 43-7 record into Thursday’s opening-round match against Woodstock Marian junior Dan French. “You leave everything on the mat every day.”

Doing so has put him in position to cap his career with a state medal.

A two-sport standout with the Raiders — he was an anchor along the line for QND’s playoff-qualifying football team — Darnell’s passion has always been wrestling, ever since his dad introduced him to the sport as a first grader. There have been moments where the challenges and the work in the wrestling room wore him down, but he never gave up on pursuing his passion.

“When I first got into it, I loved wrestling,” Darnell said. “In the middle years, I started to get a little bit burned out and not in love with it as much. Then you start getting back in a rhythm, you start finding success and really fall in love with it all over again.

“And I love it. It’s my life. I spend a lot of time doing it. I really love it.”

It’s the kind of love you fully embrace, something his father, Sam, taught him to do.

A multi-sport athlete at QND who graduated in 1996, Sam Darnell poured his love of wrestling into youth coaching as he helped build the Quincy Cyclones wrestling club in the early 2000s. Ryan Darnell and countless others received their introduction to wrestling with the Cyclones.

“He was a very big part of the whole Quincy wrestling movement,” Ryan said of his father.

More importantly, Sam has been in Ryan’s corner through everything.

“The biggest thing that made it possible was my dad always pushing me to do better,” Ryan said. “He’s always pushing me to go to practice, always pulling the best out of me.”

That used to be rolling around together on the living room floor or the wrestling room mat, but those days have passed them by.

“He doesn’t like to anymore,” Ryan said. “He hates it now.”

That doesn’t keep the kid from trying.

“I still mess with him all the time,” Ryan said with a smile.

But when Sam pushes back, no one forgets who the dad is.

“He’s still in charge,” Ryan said.

And the rock the 18-year-old can lean on whenever necessary.

At the same time, they’ve learned to lean on each other. In Dec. 2021, they lost their wife and mother — Shay Darnell — when she passed away at the age of 46.

“It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through,” Ryan said.

But he had his dad by his side 

“Through everything,” Ryan said.

It heightened their bond.

“I never saw my dad cry until then,” Ryan said. “Going through that changes you. We needed each other.”

Losing his mom provides additional motivation now.

“Now I have something to fight for,” Ryan said. “Now I have a reason.”

And he knows exactly what her words of encouragement would be.

“Wrestle hard, wrestle smart and have fun,” Darnell said.

He hears it in her voice.

“Of course,” Darnell said. “I hear her voice in a lot of things.”

He hears his dad’s voice above all others, and he can already hear what advice Sam will offer before Thursday’s match.

“No stupid decisions,” Ryan said. “Wrestle like you know how to and you’ll win.”

It’s some of the same advice his dad has been offering since Ryan was 6 years old, and should that advice pay off in victory, they’ll discuss it afterward.

“First one I talk to is my dad,” Ryan said.

And the first one you look at for a reaction after a match?

“My dad,” Darnell said.

More often than not, Sam is standing there clapping his big, burly paws together in appreciation for another job well done.

There are only so many more times he gets to do that before his son’s weekend, season and career all end.

Ryan believes it will be bittersweet for his father.

“He’s going to love watching me win,” Ryan said. “And he’s going to hate seeing it end.”

They both will, which is why Ryan hasn’t given any thought to how he’ll celebrate whatever the outcome is.

“I don’t know yet,” Darnell said. “I can’t imagine it being over, so I don’t know what my celebration will be. It may be a tear or two.”

The shoulder they fall on will be his dad’s, just like it has always been.